whitebeltwriter:

dual-destininies:

derples:

dual-destininies:

tf2-fandomstuck:

tiniestshorts:

Bread knife

The french have grown more powerful. 

Hold it!

Look more closely at these photographs, Your Honor.

Notice anything strange about the bread?

I didn’t either. That’s because…

…no cuts were made there in the first place!

The witness forged the photographs to make it look like they had an actual bread knife, when they actually did not!

How, you ask? Look to the second photo.

While it is quite obvious that the knife is penetrating the top half of the breadstick, I’m not sure about the bottom half.

Looks pretty flat, doesn’t it?

The angle of the photo makes it look like the knife is in the witness’s breadstick, whilst it is actually behind it. In addition, the cut was actually made after the first photograph and before the second. Continue to the third photograph.

It is also taken from a flat angle, as was the second photograph. I’m sure you’re finding something missing in this photograph as well, Your Honor. Where is the index finger’s fingertip?

This illustration explains it all.

While I am… ahem, not the best artist…

(Didn’t I go to art school?)

The index finger is hidden behind the loaf of bread. It is not wrapping around the loaf of bread. This is because…

The witness was making space to put the knife’s handle!

Objection

Are you really that dull, Wright? For a man who majored in art you should be able to recognize a sculpture when you see one.

as we can see from the photos provided, this is quite obviously plastic.

if you look at any photo of real bread it can’t attain that level of shininess, and even if it could.

If you’ll notice in this picture, the bread on the inside is quite shiny, as well.

Tell me, Wright, have you ever seen real bread gleam that much? Don’t answer that, I will.

Even in this high-resolution photograph with bread that thick, it obviously wouldn’t shine on the inside when it isn’t buttered.

And it isn’t too hard to find the item in question with a quick google search.

Oh, and if you will notice, their hand was covering the seam where the bread was taken apart in the first photo with a simple comparison of the pattern on the bread.

It appears your lawyering skills are in much need of some sharpening if you expect to cut me down with that weak objection.

Edgeworth, you’re asking yourself the wrong question. It’s not “is there bread like that…”

You should be asking “can there be bread like that?”

Sweet bread can be infused with sugar or a syrup, making the outsides shinier- and the insides sweeter. Take a look.

Furthermore. there are parts of the witness’s bread knife that don’t just match up with the novelty bread knives you have presented. Take another look.

Let me point out two things about the novelty knives: one, their markings, and two, the placement of the knife itself.

In the novelty knives, the marks are artificial-looking and repeated. That is because they are manufactured. In the witness’s photo, the marks are more natural and realistic- because they are, well, real!

Furthermore, the blades on the novelty knives are in the middle of the handle.

But… look back at the witness’s photo. The knife is to the left? Where is the problem, you ask? Look at this illustration.

Here we have the knife, a piece of bread, and a table. Let’s have a go.

I’m sure you see it now, Your Honor.

The bread knife cannot actually be used to cut bread efficiently! Even if it was tilted, it would be uncomfortable and unbalanced!

The defense has an explanation for this positioning.

The blade is to the left because the witness was holding it behind the piece of bread!

(Source: tiniestcostume)

armaknee:

igperish:

Aziz Ansari is a Feminist

His analogy is completely off. You cannot compare an ideology/political movement to a learned discipline. With ideologies you make a conscious decision whether to fall under the principles of the ideology even if you share their views. With a discipline or career choice like dermatology , the title comes with the discipline. It’s not an opinion.

I continue to see this argument presented “If you believe in equity between the sexes you ARE a feminist" but this is as valid as saying "If you believe that theft is a morally incorrect action you ARE a Christian”. You can hold an opinion and not identify as the member of a religion or political stance - you can hold an idea independent of a title. This is feminism trying to be the only voice of egalitarianism when multiple voices can and do exist on gender equity. If you believe in gender equity, you believe in gender equity, that’s it - whether you then choose to identify as a feminist, a men’s rights activist, a woman’s rights activist, an egalitarian OR hold no title is then up to the individual to decide - but the belief does not come with the title.

hokuto-ju-no-ken:

unexplained-events:

Cat

Cougar breaks into man’s house and….destroys his blinds.

That’s not a man’s house.

That’s the cougar’s house now.

siggymcpissyface:

solarsenpai:

jetstream-tormod:

solarsenpai:

jetstream-tormod:

solarsenpai:

This the rawest scooby doo villain and you can’t tell me a damn thing

what about the nazi bird that shot a girl to death?

what the fuck?



WHAT THE FUCK????

WHAT.

siggymcpissyface:

solarsenpai:

jetstream-tormod:

solarsenpai:

jetstream-tormod:

solarsenpai:

This the rawest scooby doo villain and you can’t tell me a damn thing

what about the nazi bird that shot a girl to death?

what the fuck?

WHAT THE FUCK????

WHAT.

fuckthefearturkey:

throw-away-opinions:

I’m convinced that if you were to shout into Brianna Wu’s ear that you would hear an echo from the large, cavernous space where her brain is supposed to be.

For those confused, when you post in a thread on 8chan’s /gg/ board, you are given an ID attached to all your posts for that thread. IDs change for each thread, but there’s no way to post under another poster’s ID.

This means that the planning of vague threats against Brianna was all posted by a single person, pretending to be multiple people talking to themselves. This is known as samefagging on image boards and it’s the reason why /gg/ uses IDs in the first place. You can’t pretend to be a mob of people all agreeing with one stupid idea when everyone can clearly see you are the same person.

And not that it really needs to be pointed out, but of the hundreds of threads and nearly 1000 posts per hour, and Brianna has two instance of singular idiots pretending to be some Pro-GG folks planning to harass her, and she’s still crying about that ONE GUY who had nothing to do with GG that sent her nasty messages that made her flee her home and go couchsurfing at a bunch of TV stations.

She’s so fucking stupid I swear to gahhhhhd. She just went off on a “I’m a victim, protect me” tirade when people were like, “Yo that ID is the same, these are totes fake.”

listener-blue:

adhoption:

shinygays:

thekiwicanfly:

They say businesses should always listen to the conversations hapenning in social media between their consumers and this is one of those times for them to be listening

yeah like the time they made that live action film for us, that was great

They’re meant to be making another one :(

(Source: ninepointeight)